My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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