so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We are all done wearing pants today
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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