Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Dear god my vagina.
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