So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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