I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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