she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You smell like stripper and shame
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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