apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
