I wannas sexs uuuuu
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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