There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I have already put on my inside pants.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
