Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
