we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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