Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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