The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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