Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
