its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
this is an emotional support booty call
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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