yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
