Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
