New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
My feet surprised me
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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