If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
