you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
