i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
