Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
