Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
