Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
