she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
