yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Randomize
