Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
