Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
