Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I think I just sharted jello shots
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
