i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
