she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
