Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
