He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
