life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
