we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
