I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
