I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
