I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
