you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
My balls are so social today.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
