hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
that's an acceptable place to lick
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
