He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
