The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
