how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
