Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
