One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
