her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
