Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
