She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
