So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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