but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
