yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Pants are for mortals
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
